There was a scientist who was studying frogs.

The scientist told the frog to jump, so the frog jumped, and he jumped 4 feet. So the scientist wrote in his notebook: a frog with 4 feet jumps 4 feet.

The scientist then cut of one leg. He told the frog to jump, so the frog jumped. He jumped 3 feet. So the scientist wrote in his notebook: a frog with 3 feet jumps 3 feet.

The scientist then cut off one more leg. He told the frog to jump, so the frog jumped. He jumped 2 feet. So the scientist wrote in his notebook: a frog with 2 feet jumps 2 feet.

The scientist cut off one more leg. He told the frog to jump, so the frog jumped. He jumped 1 foot. So the scientist wrote in his notebook: a frog with 1 foot jumps 1 foot.

The scientist cut off the last leg. He told the frog jump, Jump, JUMP!

But the frog did not move. So the scientist wrote in his notebook: a frog with no legs goes deaf.

I called the Psychic Friends hotline, we spoke for six hours, and she did not realize that I wasn't going to pay my bill. -- Michael Aronin

When pursued by an enemy, the sea cucumber, a relative of the starfish, resorts to one of nature's neatest tricks for warding off an attacker.

Not for the sea cumber is the skunk's gross way of defending itself by making a big stink.

Nor would the sea cucumber be so crude as to emulate the octopus, which fills the water around itself with impenetrable black ink when threatened.

No, the sea cucumber foils its foe by detaching its intestines and tossing them at the feet, fins, tentacles —what have you—of its enemy to confuse and delay it.

I went to the airport. I had three pieces of luggage. I said that I want this piece to go to Cleveland, this piece to Toronto, and this piece to Florida.

The airline agent said, "We can't do that."

I replied, "Well, you did it last week."